Round and round we go

I am sitting in the exit row of a very old 737 aircraft. Two things strike me as immeditely remarkable about this. First, the in-flight map indicates we are now flying over Sarajevo on a trajecotry for Greece. There’s a lot of history beneath me. Second, when was smoking on airplanes reinstated? Seriously, it’s really happening. For a brief moment that odor coupled with the color schemes and patterns on the upholstery had me convinced it was 1978. Fortunately a man clad head-to-toe in black technical, outdoor clothing is gesturing overtly on his iPad to help me decipher the actual year in which I am writing this. Or is he a mime? He is rather pale and keeps tapping that glass screen as if he’s trying to break out of an invisible glass house…

Flying seems to be hit-or-miss affair. Fly first class and it’s a decent way to get around, even for somebody as tall as I am. Anything else – with the possible exception of the exit rows on certain planes – and it borders on unpleasant. I liked the new Airbus plane that zipped me from Chicago to Munich: a very quiet, modern interior; very comfortable seats; a plethora of in-flight entertainment options. The plane even had bathrooms on a lower level where you could move about and stretch your legs. That turned out to be a good thing because the spacing of the seats on that plane is absurd. I’m talking Hobbit-sized absurd which meant rather than having my own seat it felt as if I shared one with the gentleman next to me. I was also subjected to some new form of in-flight torture every time the person in front me reclined their seat. Think sharp plastic edge razoring into your shin.

All was not lost however. A 1-hour layover in Munich meant time for a beer and the genesys of a new photo series for documenting my travels. Including airport layovers, I will visit 12 nations on this tour and intend to drink a beer in each, photographing the occasion. Maybe I can sell it to the US Postal Service for inclusion on a series of stamps. Failing that, I’m sure we can composite the 12 images into something that the JC Penny photo studio would be keen to use for a portrait background. Afterall, they did discontinue the classic 80’s background incorporating neon pink and blue laser beams…